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Minus IQ's New Blog.
July 18th, 5.00am: I wake up, thankfully in my own bed, which is a bit of a rarity these days…har har…oh who am I kidding, I'm a singer and occasional keyboardist, not some oversexed love stud who picks up women with the skill and ease of a sexually frustrated, yet well trained hunting kingfisher. Anyhow the disturbing thing is that my throat is burning, I reach for a glass of water and on sipping it hurts to swallow. From experience I know this isn't good, in fact it's very, very bad. Sweating and shivering, I try to get back to sleep but to no avail…long story short; book doctors appointment, go to doctors, say "ah" (say it pretty well in fact, I am a singer remember…ooo), get diagnosed with tonsillitis.
Balls!
One thing that shocked me about my inevitable demise is how overpriced Penicillin is these days, £7.10 for a week's course of the drug which as far as I remember from GCSE biology, is essentially mould, considering it grows in open air, mould should be free, but then again if I'd spent the same amount on petrol I'd only be able to travel from here to……………………………………..here. Topical!
For those not in the know, another downside to Penicillin is that it tastes like death. If the essence of death and all the negative things that come with it: grief, mourning, funeral costs, inheritance tax etc, could be harnessed and synthesized into a flavour, you know, like Every Flavour Beans (is that a trademark now?), then it would have the same bitter, tongue-scrapingly vile taste of Penicillin.
So after buying these antibiotics, in order to make the short-term burning go away I proceeded to buy as many of the strongest painkillers and throat numbing medicines as I could get my filthy oversized hands on. After all, when it comes to pain I am essentially a complete drama queen.
So all dosed up, dazed and confused, I decided it would now be appropriate to watch "Blade Runner", the 80s Sci-Fi movie that Michael has been telling me to watch for the past 3 months. "Watch it, its awesome, the music's awesome!" He's been saying, he's right; it's amazing. I'm glad now that our musical direction for album #2 has become, "we want it to sound like Blade Runner, but with insane amounts of fuzz bass and heavy guitars". Watch it, watch it now!
I also watched "The Departed" which gave me a strange urge to want to murder someone or something; I wonder who will be first? Ouch better not write that on here, the US government are checking our Youtube viewing habits, Virgin Media are slapping the wrists of downloaders, so the natural progression is that I'll get arrested for mentioning the word "Murder" in my blog…once again…topical!
Whilst I withered away yesterday, the real members of the band went to the club "West Rocks" where "Cage The Elephant" were supposed to be playing but had to cancel since Matt (singer) injured himself and now can't fly, he could fly before you see, remember Dumbo "When I see an Elephant Fly!" That's where they got their name from.
Anyway the fabulous "Das Pop!" headlined instead. I wanted to be there since Laura Marling was DJing and she is amazing, although actually I must point out here my view that: ITS REALLY ANNOYING WHEN BANDS/ARTISTS ARE ADVERTISED TO BE PLAYING SOMWHERE WHEN THEY'RE ACTUALLY ONLY DJING BECAUSE I DON'T WANT TO SEE THEM PLAY RECORDS I WANT TO SEE THEM PLAY THEIR SONGS!
Anyway, as I knew he would, Michael spoke to Miss Marling, I'm not sure what about, but I know if I had spoken to her I would have probably said "Hello Laura Marling, I must say that you've made probably my favourite record of the year so far, I really enjoy listening to it when I'm at the gym, or perhaps on a run, even in bed in fact, its multi-purpose like that, a sort of Swiss Army album, although lately its been hard to listen to since my iPod's somewhere in South London. I remember when I first saw you live you were wearing an Offspring T-shirt, I like the Offspring too, and did you know that we have four mutual friends on Facebook, lets be mates! ". She was smoking apparently, I don't smoke. We can never be matesL.
The guys also witnessed Peaches Geldof's singing debut, in her new band "This Tawdry Affair" her sister Pixie and father Sir Bob, were also there. I'll get Michael to write a synopsis of this, because I wasn't there;
(This is where his synopsis will go, and this is where the newspapers will quote us when our tabloid war with the Geldof family is in full swing.)
Today, I have been resting quite a bit, but thankfully the swelling has reduced so I can taste food again, I'm still pretty dazed though which is probably why none of this blog will make a great deal of sense and has no form or order to it whatsoever, and its probably riddled with grammatical errors, contradictions and inconsistencies. Hell, this whole paragraph should have been at the beginning anyway!
I wrote to a bunch of people in Liverpool today to announce to them that we're playing there again, because woo, we are! In fact we've got a right little tour coming up in September/October, with some nice little support slots included. I am still very excited about the Shoreditch Shuffle since amongst other bands the Five O'clock Heroes have been announced this week, their song with Agyness Deyn is really happy, although it's probably not supposed to be, I'm no music journalist. I hope she's at the Shuffle too so we can beg her to sing for us again.*
*(For non regular readers, this is funny because The Sun Online wrote a piece saying that we were seen at a club in Soho begging her to sing for us…read this more regularly and you'll see that I'm really a comic genius)
As far as the single we promised ages ago goes, the artwork is finished and it's ready to go, I think we're just waiting on the ring-tone; yes we're doing a ring-tone too, so now you can advertise your popularity at glass-smashing volume with our infectiously repetitive music. Please be patient.
On Wednesday we're playing at Proud Galleries, this is exciting, but what's more exciting is that I have some photos from our party there which shall be going up in our pictures bit so I'll link them into here when that's done.
Elsewhere in news, I forgot to mention that Jake turned 20 this week.
Congratulations Jake you're a man now, well not technically, but I won't go into that, after all tts not fair to discuss surgical proceedings on the web.
We celebrated with a fun filled year 11 style house party; violet dodge ball, heavy petting, the works, and also went clubbing at the delightful "Cheapskates" in Soho, the club in which most of our album's tales stem from; the tremendous cheap drinks, the dangerous amount of hormones flying about, the "its ok I was drunk" mentality…classic, like being young again!
That's now 4 years worth of presents I owe Jake, so what's that err.. here to
>
>
>
>
>
Here
In petrol
Right, before all of this supposedly healthy mould eats away at my fingers any more, I'm going to sleep!
P.S, for the record Aimz=Ali
xXx
Balls!
One thing that shocked me about my inevitable demise is how overpriced Penicillin is these days, £7.10 for a week's course of the drug which as far as I remember from GCSE biology, is essentially mould, considering it grows in open air, mould should be free, but then again if I'd spent the same amount on petrol I'd only be able to travel from here to……………………………………..here. Topical!
For those not in the know, another downside to Penicillin is that it tastes like death. If the essence of death and all the negative things that come with it: grief, mourning, funeral costs, inheritance tax etc, could be harnessed and synthesized into a flavour, you know, like Every Flavour Beans (is that a trademark now?), then it would have the same bitter, tongue-scrapingly vile taste of Penicillin.
So after buying these antibiotics, in order to make the short-term burning go away I proceeded to buy as many of the strongest painkillers and throat numbing medicines as I could get my filthy oversized hands on. After all, when it comes to pain I am essentially a complete drama queen.
So all dosed up, dazed and confused, I decided it would now be appropriate to watch "Blade Runner", the 80s Sci-Fi movie that Michael has been telling me to watch for the past 3 months. "Watch it, its awesome, the music's awesome!" He's been saying, he's right; it's amazing. I'm glad now that our musical direction for album #2 has become, "we want it to sound like Blade Runner, but with insane amounts of fuzz bass and heavy guitars". Watch it, watch it now!
I also watched "The Departed" which gave me a strange urge to want to murder someone or something; I wonder who will be first? Ouch better not write that on here, the US government are checking our Youtube viewing habits, Virgin Media are slapping the wrists of downloaders, so the natural progression is that I'll get arrested for mentioning the word "Murder" in my blog…once again…topical!
Whilst I withered away yesterday, the real members of the band went to the club "West Rocks" where "Cage The Elephant" were supposed to be playing but had to cancel since Matt (singer) injured himself and now can't fly, he could fly before you see, remember Dumbo "When I see an Elephant Fly!" That's where they got their name from.
Anyway the fabulous "Das Pop!" headlined instead. I wanted to be there since Laura Marling was DJing and she is amazing, although actually I must point out here my view that: ITS REALLY ANNOYING WHEN BANDS/ARTISTS ARE ADVERTISED TO BE PLAYING SOMWHERE WHEN THEY'RE ACTUALLY ONLY DJING BECAUSE I DON'T WANT TO SEE THEM PLAY RECORDS I WANT TO SEE THEM PLAY THEIR SONGS!
Anyway, as I knew he would, Michael spoke to Miss Marling, I'm not sure what about, but I know if I had spoken to her I would have probably said "Hello Laura Marling, I must say that you've made probably my favourite record of the year so far, I really enjoy listening to it when I'm at the gym, or perhaps on a run, even in bed in fact, its multi-purpose like that, a sort of Swiss Army album, although lately its been hard to listen to since my iPod's somewhere in South London. I remember when I first saw you live you were wearing an Offspring T-shirt, I like the Offspring too, and did you know that we have four mutual friends on Facebook, lets be mates! ". She was smoking apparently, I don't smoke. We can never be matesL.
The guys also witnessed Peaches Geldof's singing debut, in her new band "This Tawdry Affair" her sister Pixie and father Sir Bob, were also there. I'll get Michael to write a synopsis of this, because I wasn't there;
(This is where his synopsis will go, and this is where the newspapers will quote us when our tabloid war with the Geldof family is in full swing.)
Today, I have been resting quite a bit, but thankfully the swelling has reduced so I can taste food again, I'm still pretty dazed though which is probably why none of this blog will make a great deal of sense and has no form or order to it whatsoever, and its probably riddled with grammatical errors, contradictions and inconsistencies. Hell, this whole paragraph should have been at the beginning anyway!
I wrote to a bunch of people in Liverpool today to announce to them that we're playing there again, because woo, we are! In fact we've got a right little tour coming up in September/October, with some nice little support slots included. I am still very excited about the Shoreditch Shuffle since amongst other bands the Five O'clock Heroes have been announced this week, their song with Agyness Deyn is really happy, although it's probably not supposed to be, I'm no music journalist. I hope she's at the Shuffle too so we can beg her to sing for us again.*
*(For non regular readers, this is funny because The Sun Online wrote a piece saying that we were seen at a club in Soho begging her to sing for us…read this more regularly and you'll see that I'm really a comic genius)
As far as the single we promised ages ago goes, the artwork is finished and it's ready to go, I think we're just waiting on the ring-tone; yes we're doing a ring-tone too, so now you can advertise your popularity at glass-smashing volume with our infectiously repetitive music. Please be patient.
On Wednesday we're playing at Proud Galleries, this is exciting, but what's more exciting is that I have some photos from our party there which shall be going up in our pictures bit so I'll link them into here when that's done.
Elsewhere in news, I forgot to mention that Jake turned 20 this week.
Congratulations Jake you're a man now, well not technically, but I won't go into that, after all tts not fair to discuss surgical proceedings on the web.
We celebrated with a fun filled year 11 style house party; violet dodge ball, heavy petting, the works, and also went clubbing at the delightful "Cheapskates" in Soho, the club in which most of our album's tales stem from; the tremendous cheap drinks, the dangerous amount of hormones flying about, the "its ok I was drunk" mentality…classic, like being young again!
That's now 4 years worth of presents I owe Jake, so what's that err.. here to
>
>
>
>
>
Here
In petrol
Right, before all of this supposedly healthy mould eats away at my fingers any more, I'm going to sleep!
P.S, for the record Aimz=Ali
xXx
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